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Summed Days Drifting Away
2003-03-30 at 8:00 p.m.
Listening to: "Nice Guys Finish Last" by Green day
Feeling: exhausted
I have ohso much to talk about right now and not nearly enough time to say it all! I hate this!
Well, I'm not sure when the last time I wrote was but not long after that I left for Bend with Jared and his parents. The trip was fun but I hated it at the same time. I felt so awkward like I didn't know what I was doing and that I was in the way a whole bunches. I also felt like I was acting ungrateful but I just hate saying thank you... I feel so awkward saying it and I don't know why, I just always have. Last nite I felt even worst going into Jared's room like a baby being scared of the dark. I know he didn't mind too much, but I couldn't keep myself from crying. I'm glad that he was willing to be there for me unlike a certain ex boyfriend of mine. It meant a lot to have him stay up with me and hold my hand instead of just telling me to go to sleep. The sad thing is I've seen so much of his this break that I think it's gonna be hard for me to be without him. I'm gonna miss him more than ever.
Today while Jared and I were standing outside him house I was reminded of last spring/summer. You have no idea how much I miss Katie, Tara, Shauna, and Carissa. I miss having friends. The summer was so perfect; I wish it could have stayed like that forever and ever. There were so many good times... I wish I knew how we all drifted apart. I always think it's because of me and Jared, but I hope that’s not it. It's probably my own fault... Because of the Jesse thing I really took myself away from everything and everyone, but things are so much better from me now and I really need the support cuz I've been slacking in school and whatnot... I guess I just miss them and the boys and the fun more than anything...
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envyyou
jenifer-007
boysxkickxme
jarardlikesu
ending-here
DearJared
weneedariot
x-star-
blackout-
dana-elayne
emokid-112
xshebreaks
andwebreathe
kaydizzle
gloryxxfades
britneypink
eatxmexalive
yourmove-
darceek
onlydespair
girls-suck
greed-
amber163
fragiledeath
lovemeonce
xbeeyatchx
addisen
ifiwere
forever-emo-